It seems like I run into lots of people who are busy working, taking care of everyone, and struggling.  So, if that sounds like you, you are not alone, and you can find a way to better health and happiness.  I know, because this was my case years ago.  “No time” to take care of myself with my busy life, or so I thought.  Once I started prioritizing my own health and happiness, everything changed.  It took time - years, but I persisted. 

Here are 5 ways to start making small changes now that will cause a ripple effect for the rest of your days.

1. Negative thinking

What excuses are you hearing yourself say out loud or internally?  Stop. Challenge it.  “I don’t have time to exercise.”  I love this one.  Really?  Is it that you don’t have time, or that you are not prioritizing your health and wellbeing over taking care of others, your family, boss, community.  There is no one in the world that can take care of this piece for you, only you. Challenge this thought and figure out how you can fit something into your day or week.  Maybe a 20-minute walk on Saturday morning before everyone in the house wakes up, for example. Figure out what CAN work for you, and try it out.  Then adjust and do it again.

2. Clean Up Your Kitchen & Pantry

Get organized with a kitchen and pantry that supports your health. If I don’t buy the junk, we won’t eat. If my family really wants something, they can get it somewhere else, at work, at school, when out with friends, etc.  You might make excuses about this too, “but he loves cookies, and I want to make him happy”.  It is possible to change! We quit ice cream, not by declaring, “we are quitting ice cream today”, but just by me not buying it any more.  Then after a few weeks they would ask for ice cream and I’d buy some.  Then it ran out, and I didn’t buy it anymore, until they asked for it again, but this time months later, and so I bought it again.  Over time they realized that they didn’t “need” it or want it, and it wasn’t such a good habit, and stopped asking for it. We have not bought ice cream and had it in the house for at least the last five years.  Guess what – no one misses it.  In the summer time, ice cream is a real treat when vacationing, or out on a weekend.  But it is no longer a nightly occurrence.

Over the years I’ve learned more about cooking healthy meals and eliminating certain foods that were triggers or didn’t make me feel great.  I also started substituting healthier ingredients in meals, which helped change our tastes over time. I no longer have these unhelpful foods in the kitchen, refrigerator, freezer, or pantry.

3. Meal Plan

When you are busy working full time all day, dinner can be frozen dinners (loaded with sodium and preservatives), or take out pizza or Chinese food. When I was really busy with working full time, kid’s sports after school, PTA meetings, etc. we ended up ordering out all the time.  I realized this was not healthy for any of us.  Chinese one night, then leftovers the next night, and then pizza on Friday nights.  Once I started taking a few minutes to do some meal planning for the following week by looking at the calendar, then making a list and shopping just for those ingredients, our meals got healthier.  On Saturday I’d shop and then do some meal prep on the weekend. I learned how to batch cook once, freeze half, and have that at the ready for another time.  Meals could be simple, and we became okay with soup and salad and not gourmet, which saves lots of time and energy.  With a few minutes of meal planning for the following week, meal prep on the weekend and having a few things ready to go, you are eating healthier and supporting your health.

4. Cooking at Home

Research has shown that those who cook real whole food at home are less likely to have conditions such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, overweight, diabetes, and greater risk for certain cancers.  Years ago, I started cooking with simple fresh ingredients and spices, not just salt and pepper, to enhance our meals.  I also lowered the fat content in traditional recipes by using using chicken or vegetable broth. I also used other substitutions like applesauce instead of oil in baking, and transitioned away from highly processed vegetable oils and now use EVOO and grape seed oil.  Cooking at home doesn’t have to be difficult, and it can be a family activity too.  With some meal planning (#3 above), cooking is easy.

5. Putting Yourself First

I had to learn this first by recognizing my feelings of resentment that I was over worked, stressed and exhausted.  Once I recognized this, then I had to decide what to do.  I started by taking some time to walk by myself and leave the baby with my husband.  I got used to the feeling and tried something else like joining the gym and going to a class on Saturday morning.  I started walking around the soccer field during practice instead of sitting in a chair with the other parents.  Then I started walking around the parking lot during my son’s tae kwon do practice. Since the lesson was for an hour, I’d walk for 30 minutes and watch for 30 minutes.  I didn’t miss anything, and I felt more energetic and happier that I was meeting my own needs for movement and stress relief. At first felt guilty, but I was still there for my family and it turned out, I was there for them in a better mood. 

What can you do today to take care of yourself?

On December 31, 2017 I took my usual Sunday morning yoga class with the same yoga community I’ve been with all year.  Our yoga teacher likes to read from Melody Beattie’s Journey To The Heart from time to time and this day she read about destiny.  After the class, my friend Mary and I both agreed we enjoyed the reading and I told her I have the book on my Amazon wish list and I don’t know why I haven’t just gotten it for myself.  I guess I’m not really in the practice of buying whatever I want when I want, like some people do.  I just wasn’t raised that way.  You got gifts on your birthday, or at Christmas, and you didn’t buy yourself things. She commented that perhaps I could get it and start 2018 out with something new.  I went home and pushed the “buy” button.  That night, friends, including Mary, came to celebrate New Year’s Eve.  At the end of the night I saw a wrapped gift, “to Mary Ellen, from Santa”, it read.  I opened the wrapping and there it was, the book my friend and I had talked about earlier that day. Of course she was “Santa”.  It was late, so at a reasonable time in the morning, I sent her a text to tell her that I received the book from Santa, and thank you.  I also told her that I ordered the very same book for myself one day earlier when we discussed it.  I asked if she had bought herself a copy and she told me that when she went to the bookstore, they only had one copy.  She bought the only copy for me, and so didn’t have a copy for herself.  Well, I told her, another copy is on its’ way, and it would be for her.  It was destiny.